Will you get up off your knees?

I'm twenty two years old. It's a long way off until twenty three, too. And you know what's been flapping in my ears incessantly, making me feel crazy? Marriage.

That's right, marriage. I hardly think I'm unique in this. I did, however, think I was of the general consent when I decided a long time ago that I don't want to get married until... you know... thirty or something. Who knows. Not yet. But each day that goes on, there are more and more of my closest friends growing up getting engaged or married. One time last week, somebody got engaged and another was married in one day, and the next, another engagement. My head was spinning-- I've just moved to a new place, from which I plan to move to another new place, and on, until I finish what I've set out to do in life.

Here's the problem: with all of these people getting married so young, I'm forced to consider that "pursuing your dreams" and "settling down" are not mutually exclusive. This is a tough thought. The times I've felt most settled in life are those times that I've been least inspired. The times when I've been most inspired are the times I feel like a piece of shit, like I have no friends, that no woman should ever put herself through the pain of actually wanting to be in a relationship with me; and you know what? Through conditioning or some other chemical something connection going on in my brain, I've grown to like those feelings. I get more shit done that way.

But what I mean to say is, maybe it's just mutually exclusive for me (although I find it hard to believe that when considering to plan an entire wedding, buy a house, think about KIDS and shit, anybody would have any time-- or more specifically, mental energy-- to get anything done in the morning or before they go to bed AT ALL) and maybe I'm one of these dudes not meant to be married for a long time. Is this a bad thing? You know, I think it is.

Just that everybody is getting married right now puts a great deal of pressure on other members of their generation to do so. I mean, christ, why else would somebody be compelled to be married? Is it because they all just fell in love with "the one" at the same time in life? I think it has more in common, probably, with lunch and dinner rushes at a restaurant. Either everybody gets hungry at the same time, or everybody sees everybody eating their big, juicy burgers, and wants a piece of that. So either this wave of marriage will end with many divorces (which, come on guys, is obviously the case), or everybody will live happily ever after.

Good way to deal with all of this? Just get engaged. Don't get married.